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令人爆笑的童言無忌經典笑話

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發表於 2007-12-17 08:38:56 | 顯示全部樓層 |閱讀模式
No Hoes 沒有鋤頭0 l, H' W2 S, H$ }. o& {
  
+ E) z; y) f$ X4 z    A thirteen-year-old boy was sitting on the sofa watching TV when the phone rang. 4 r: z! q8 G1 M0 F  |1 T) |
  
: A& [2 u# j7 x+ C" U    「Hello, my son.」 it was his father』s voice, 「where is your mother?」 0 _$ Y0 b% p) ]" K- o0 `
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    「Mother is working in the garden.」 " S7 d% k7 D2 ?
  
+ K" K" d% f! l6 L) Z3 {    「What?」 barked the father, 「Your mother is not as young and strong as she used to be. Why aren』t you helping her?」
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0 {6 t8 A7 D2 ~, C) m" \' N, k    「I can』t.」 was the reply. 「Grandma is using the other hoe.」
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4 ~% q# Z- O. G+ f6 x    一個13歲的男孩正坐在沙發上看電視,這時電話響了。 $ P3 X6 l9 x2 U2 _% f" s
  
  `1 ~8 R4 b, X, C9 V    「喂,兒子。」是父親打來的。「你媽呢?」 1 L5 H" e$ w: `' E* r
  
! m" |: q1 e( I* f" U7 b    「媽媽在院子裡幹活呢!」
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) G, X6 q/ D+ `* ?    「什麼?」父親吼道。「你媽已經不如從前那麼強壯了。你這時怎麼不在幫她?」 5 e" Z5 \0 F$ L
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    「不行啊!」兒子答道。「另一把鋤頭奶奶正在用呢!」 ' U6 s+ q6 W9 O# g, e' G" B
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9 ~* w" P- \/ Z0 N. m& i0 E    Is there a crib in your stomach? 肚子裡有小床嗎?
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    When my sister-in-low Leach was expecting her second child, her sonBrain would sometimes touch his mother』s tummy to feel the baby move.
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& w8 [+ q- y1 S% U    One day, while touching her stomach and not feel anything, he asked, 「How come the baby isn』t moving?」
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# [6 L( s, S2 p# w) F    「The baby is sleeping.」 replied his mother. 4 ]) o- p% f8 v2 f3 t
  
" x3 _! G* ]' i  B( \    Brain thought a moment and then said, 「You mean you got a crib in there too?」
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    我丈夫的妹妹Leah懷著第二個孩子時,他的兒子Brain會時不時摸著她的肚子感覺嬰兒的移動。 . f$ g  z" p! ?: ?# I, d
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    有一天,當Brain撫摸著媽大人您好肚子感覺不到什麼時,問道:「為什麼BB不動的?」
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; n9 s1 C0 c- C/ U3 `$ _; r: Y3 }( O# z    「它在睡覺呢!」他媽媽答道。
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, ~( l. Y7 J1 A, i3 r9 {    Brain想了一會後說:「你是說你肚子裡面也有張床?」 : d  G3 j$ O, {! j0 s4 Y/ r) X+ u2 S
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    Why is he crying? 他為什麼哭泣? 5 G5 I. b- |1 X: D; H
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    「Tom, what』s the matter with your brother?」 asked the mother in the kitchen. 「He』s crying.」
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0 a& a6 r' }9 ~3 ?2 N2 X( [    「Oh, nothing, Mum」 replied Tom. 「I』m eating my cake. He is crying because I won』t give him any.」 & |& b4 b& Z6 e; p1 K2 |+ h
  
  q, K* F( H9 g* X. e& l' R    「But has he finished his own cake?」 6 n+ ~8 Q) {1 t& S
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    「Yes.」 said Tom. 「And he also cried when I was helping him finish that.」
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5 K0 m8 w2 K2 Y4 _  r* a+ N& E    「湯姆,你弟弟怎麼了?」在廚房的媽媽問道。「他怎麼在哭啊?」
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    「哦,沒事兒,媽媽。」湯姆回答道。「我在吃我的蛋糕。因為我不給他,他就哭了。」 % L% W6 r# [1 d7 n9 v7 r. f; {
  
) e' O6 t1 T. ?; E9 U# \    「那他吃完了自己那塊了?」
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    「是的。」湯姆說。「我幫他吃蛋糕的時候就哭了。」 % ^, F' ~8 l# N6 w, Y, \: s
  
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! f* t- Y  p; n9 U    Saving a Dollar  省下1美元
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    Johnny: Papa, would you be glad if I saved a dollar for you? 6 y: a2 q7 ]3 a
  
, T+ r) G, n+ w) o    Papa: Naturally, my son.
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$ t1 v& T0 q/ g6 m' [: V" N    Johnny: Well, I have saved one dollar for you. You said that if Ibrought a good mark this week, you would give me a dollar and I haven』tbrought one.
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  P: }& X3 A" ^6 A$ ?& b    Johnny:爸爸,如果我為你省下1美元,你高興不? 5 f5 D* q; d; Z9 }, S+ H
  
0 I) Q% z* x9 n4 ]+ ?' g, E2 B6 o    Papa:當然啦,孩子!
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; X! u% h  s% A: @8 l4 ~    Johnny:那好,我省下1美元了。你說過我這個禮拜考出好成績,就會給我1美元。我沒考好!
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