Female Stress Diet& }! Y1 j" Q; B' c& t* u
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This is a specially formulated diet, designed to help you cope
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with the stress that builds up during the day:
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BREAKFAST:
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' ~) A' G" B; W1 grapefruit- \. o Z( `; G8 |! d( O
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1 slice whole wheat toast$ V% v( P- b/ r* ]/ s
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1 cup skim milk
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+ |8 \- c" o. ]- j( O* SLUNCH
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Small portion lean, steamed chicken with a
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& W4 {6 z7 s( V. J( Wcup of spinach
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: {7 o1 V% l. k' V1 cup herbal tea
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& B& Y' h& R7 k8 x5 M0 J1 chocolate biscuit
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AFTERNOON TEA6 G; c8 t3 u2 ^4 k# V
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The rest of the chocolate biscuits in the packet ?2 [7 s' P, O2 B/ G
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1 tub of Rocky Road ice cream with Choc-ice topping/ G R/ f; i& h: C1 `: W( y
2 H& o+ Q" N1 \( G* g$ C" Y1 jar nutella' D2 S/ i9 X- D5 H5 `' }' z
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DINNER! i A" l( ^8 G& X. m% R6 e
% w C* M: l8 l9 Q4 bottles of red wine* N" b. R3 D/ U3 ?+ r/ I
6 [2 @- N" p* l" W2 }& }2 loaves garlic bread
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1 family size supreme pizza3 R2 E& y [+ B/ Y- G
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LATE NIGHT SNACK
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Whole frozen Sara Lee cheesecake (eaten6 y# s$ B2 b/ v0 h! m# u* |6 a) }
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DIET RULES:6 _3 V; m2 V9 Z
3 t/ l8 \; a2 E) j" m1. If no-one sees you eat something, it has no calories8 B, a. |/ R8 Q, M9 X$ M$ s
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2. When drinking a diet-coke with a chocolate bar, the fat in the( [6 q# b% ^; w- w$ {2 i, n: g
. z \% A( ]/ b% Ichocolate bar is cancelled out by the diet-coke.
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3. When you eat with someone else, calories0 E8 T3 }. @6 c2 `
1 G6 I% T! Z# p3 @9 r" Q9 odon't count if you do not eat more than they do.: S5 L) G2 G& E/ r% a. L
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4. Food used for medicinal purposes does NOT count. (for example:
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; {7 O$ Q" w; Q( U6 f: kchocolate, toast, cheesecake and vodka): j( t+ ~, }7 X; n( |: C. X; |5 H
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5. If you fatten up the people around you,
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- f3 |6 k1 q k0 F2 dyou will look thinner.
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$ f' E6 S% ^: \6 J6. Cinema-related foods have a zero calorie count as they are part9 ^7 i' W. Y5 X" O4 t7 s Y
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of the entertainment package and not counted as food intake.
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(this includes: popcorn, minties, maltesers, jaffas and frozen cokes): \& Q7 e' L7 w' Z, e- G
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7. Biscuit pieces have no calories because breaking the biscuits up
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0 o4 _! l& ?+ ^, ?causes calorie leakage.: u/ t4 H, r8 B
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8. Food licked from knives and spoons has$ }/ W9 l5 q' T& J
, V% \' q4 K, eno fat if you are in the process of cooking something.
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9. Foods that are the same colour have the same amount of fat.4 B3 ~8 E+ L7 J* Q6 j
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Examples are: spinach and peppermint ice-cream;apples and red jelly snakes.& E. ^: ?& e; d1 r1 _- T
& c, L9 ^2 I4 s& g7 F4 p# x10.Chocolate is a food-colour wildcard Z7 S. ~* B" q H
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and may be substituted for any other colour.. f8 L; {5 T5 e6 M6 d7 O+ `( V! i
: h- r8 w$ R/ y. K11.Anything eaten while standing has no calories due to gravity
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and the density of calorie mass.
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12.Food consumed from someone else's plate has no fat as it4 y* l9 h0 D1 b
& V0 ]; A- G% I zrightfully belongs to the other person and the fat will cling to his/her plate.1 K2 b3 p5 |4 p, j" U
+ z% n5 A1 c/ EAnd remember:
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! j3 z% K" h- [1 VSTRESSED SPELT BACKWARDS IS DESSERTS |