如果你有創意，可以找一些域名出來- ?) D! q' F+ [; K% ^
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1.The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that..."on the left side, nothing is right. On the right, nothing is left." $ g9 e& w7 j0 w$ P5 Q
2.There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700billion. The rest are all subprime. # }4 W/ j( F" @8 n: X! h4 a
1 Q, P/ I7 l3 `8 S7 L* W! s, Q" u 3.How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday. 6 i! c8 ^! F3 ]. g$ w6 j6 Y
5 I' k& _, E( a3 B1 h* V 4.For geography students: What』s the capital of Iceland? Answer: about three pounds fifty.
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$ C. O) O' y1 D* ~ 5.What』s the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie.
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9 I. K0 L! d) }% d) m* F6 w; I' W. [ h 6.Whats the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn』t. % y P; b' c4 O3 c$ c
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NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS . . .
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/ ?9 ]- a, Z7 x CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
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BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius. # g4 V7 n% l9 B3 z. y1 P
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BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex. ; t* u6 n. e+ g+ L& N
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VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower. . ^, q; O) j# O# ~4 c6 b# V' i9 F- S/ V
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P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
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|$ c; T, L+ q J- J7 H BROKER -- What my broker has made me. . o+ @. w) A* r$ T3 [) k
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STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell. 4 O* s# H* j, R( K% p
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STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
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STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
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FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
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MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
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( E/ D# B& o8 y, N0 j# S CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
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" Y% L1 G' Y' M3 j0 ?+ g) N YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
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5 i& @- g! {; O( _! k: I f WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you』re the sucker who bought Yahoo@ $240 per share. INSTITUTIONAL - F8 H: o- @3 b1 }4 B: D: B f% O! t
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INVESTOR -- Past year investor who』s now locked up in ant house. ' j0 N/ |2 a6 Q
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PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use. |
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發表於 2008-11-21 08:18:57
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