如果你有創意,可以找一些域名出來
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1.The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that..."on the left side, nothing is right. On the right, nothing is left." - f% V- y, f9 Z5 O; v1 {& Z
2.There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700billion. The rest are all subprime. * m1 [' d+ F4 e5 x3 b% t7 E
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3.How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday. . p7 `# E" v! ?* R" ^) L) t' I
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4.For geography students: What』s the capital of Iceland? Answer: about three pounds fifty., A& i& \ G* @$ @, c
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5.What』s the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie.
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6.Whats the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn』t. B5 p7 v G. L2 q! u1 O; t
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NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS . . .
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& {( B" w* Z1 K- X CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
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3 A4 R5 |- G$ s/ c, h BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius. , t) f M3 x! v# l( i
d# p) a# H y* P# ] BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
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VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
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3 R8 Q0 h* D% [5 G P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. / Q) t2 G/ b$ }, V; e; P- L& j7 x
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BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
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, C* I% }2 V# V6 w: Y" V STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
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STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
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# [2 H* H* v5 t' |: T STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves. # J" B/ G6 W$ X8 c- [0 ]* y- U
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FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected. ! V4 B! e- o+ F( k" I3 T$ H
, _1 h+ _. [& `+ D. u MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks. . w& h9 e& I' M9 {, _+ S3 F# S
' ?) \% X9 c1 r% P6 A% L0 ^ CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet. ' m0 W, y8 w7 Z
* U; r+ W0 r( Z: I+ E* L YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
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WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you』re the sucker who bought Yahoo@ $240 per share. INSTITUTIONAL * L$ T* c) i, j. U2 i
* P& ~ E) D2 i) O INVESTOR -- Past year investor who』s now locked up in ant house.
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PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use. |
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