金融危機下新版魔鬼金融字典

如果你有創意，可以找一些域名出來
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* t; ~9 X- `. a7 ~1.The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that..."on the left side, nothing is right. On the right, nothing is left."
) U- r8 n/ R7 Q$ F　　2.There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700billion. The rest are all subprime.
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　　3.How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.
　　
　　4.For geography students: What』s the capital of Iceland? Answer: about three pounds fifty.
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+ w9 x" H4 N1 ~( s　　5.What』s the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie.
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　　6.Whats the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn』t.
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　　NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS . . .
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　　CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
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　　BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
　　
2 q( A% U7 [% ?" d" G4 c: a　　BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
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- M9 w. {3 g& Q) d8 z8 x& P" t　　VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
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$ x0 b5 w! x- r! s　　P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
　　
! v8 f. s. \5 l# |& H: k　　BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
　　
　　STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
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4 `5 H+ J8 @8 X9 n  m) P1 e　　STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
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! [! ]3 M5 m# ^8 J( k. l- ?　　STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
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　　FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
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　　MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
　　
1 A3 w, P8 {. h& q' R　　CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
　　
# V6 ~7 H! m5 L# T3 Y1 x　　YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
　　
　　WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you』re the sucker who bought Yahoo@ $240 per share. INSTITUTIONAL
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. c9 I. V  ^+ B. D: b, G" E6 v　　INVESTOR -- Past year investor who』s now locked up in ant house.
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' L+ ~) Z- Q- h' O　　PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.

學習了，~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

不錯，有些新思路